To the girl still waiting

To the girl still waiting, I want you to know that you’re not alone.

The waiting season can feel very lonely, isolating and cold. I would constantly think about when it would be my turn next. I would day dream about a significant other that I knew I needed. What I truly desired was for someone to love, respect and see me for who I really am and still choose to stay. Accept my flaws, insecurities, toxic traits and my past but the real question here is, have I accepted them?

You need to love yourself first in order for someone else to love you. When you don’t love yourself enough, you think receiving the bare minimum is enough.

When you know yourself, love and respect yourself, when you accept yourself you expect nothing less from a partner. You need them to love you the way you love yourself and maybe even one up you, because you deserve it. So you see, having that waiting period is extremely important to get to know yourself, to heal and to know your worth.

It’s just a season

The waiting season is just that, a season. You’re not going to be single forever unless you choose to be. I looked at the season of waiting as a time to not only work on myself but to enjoy my time of singleness. I didn’t fully enjoy being single until right before I met my husband which was kind of too late for me. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed my waiting season. I had just moved to a new country, there was a lot to do, a lot to see but at the back of my head there was always a voice telling me I wouldn’t be completely happy until I found “the one”.

Honey you’re the one, be your own soulmate until it’s time for you to settle down. You will never be happy if you think that you need someone to complete you. You also need to understand that when you find the one, that’s it. You never get that waiting season back, this means everything you do moving forward, you’ll have to be consider your partner so while you wait why not get to know yourself as an adult, work on yourself and enjoy life with those you love?

Don’t stop evolving

What I love about our generation is how in-tune we are with our emotions. We’re going to therapy, setting boundaries and taking time for ourselves. Here are some things you should try to work on while you’re in your waiting season:

• Communication
• Forgivness
• Toxic traits
• Financial responsibility
• Healing past traumas
• Know what you’re looking for in a partner
• Personal goals
• Learn to understand your emotions
• Grow your relationship with Christ
• Take yourself out on dates (this was my favorite thing to do)
• Be okay with being alone

You’re worth the wait

If you’ve been single long enough you might at some point start questioning yourself. That’s the devil trying to get into your head. You know the saying ‘save the best for last?’ I want you to think of yourself that way, the reason God is taking a minute to send you your life partner is because He’s trying to ensure that you end up with someone very close to what you’ve been praying for. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you, we’re all a work in progress but we all deserve to be loved with our flaws and all. It may just not be your time yet, which is totally okay because once your Prince Charming shows up, it would all be worth it.

Don’t lose hope

I promise you, I’ve been there. I’m here to tell you not to give up hope. Please don’t settle for just any guy, there is someone who would be more than happy to give you the world. I promise. Have high standards and always stick to your morals and beliefs, don’t change or tweak them for anyone. The right person will never feel like you’re asking or expecting too much, they’ll love and respect you, they won’t only be your lover but your friend. Love is so beautiful and worth waiting for.

Don’t lose hope

xoxo Mrs Lyles